Whipped
Raiders of the Lost Ark
with Rifftrax Commentary
M'House
DVD
12/31/07
It's been a while since I last saw Raiders. I think the last time was when we showed it as a midnight movie back when I worked at AMC. The print looked like shit. That's all I remember. What I do remember is the first time I saw it. My dad took me to see it at AMC Colisuem 4, where I later worked, back in 1982 when it first came out. The theater now stands vacant. I remember being scared by all the skeletons. Maddy didn't seem to have the same reaction, though she did seemed concerned about "BIG BALL!"
The Rifftrax commentary was a bit underwhelming, though the Shane MacGowan joke was pretty good. So I won't even mention it again. What I noticed this time were three fairly big holes in the story that I didn't really pick up on before.
1. If Indy is leading an expedition through Peru, complete with pack mules and two other guys, exactly what is Jock supposed to be flying out in his two-person biplane?
2. How does Indy ride the U-Boat all the way to secret Nazi island? This one's actually explained by history and a deleted scenes. World War II submarines were primarily designed as surface vessels and only submerged for attack and defense purposes. There's a deleted scene showing Indy clinging to the periscope for the trip and presumably the boat never submerges.
3. How does Indy know not to look at the Ark? Again, deleted scenes to the rescue. There's a bit cut out of the scene where Indy and Sallah visit the old man who tells them about the staff of Ra where the old man tells them not to look at or touch anything in the Ark. Which seems kind of important.
So two of these things are explained through deletions, but that doesn't really explain the first bit, unless Indy's plan was to leave Doc Ock and the other guy stranded in the jungle. Which really kind of fits with his character throughout the rest of the movie. Let's take a look at our hero:
1. This is a guy who when everyone is digging out the Well of Souls just kind of walks around not doing anything other than wearing a hat.
2. Goes into a fistfight with a kick to the groin (Hey, it worked for Butch Cassidy) and then throws sand in the guy's face. Take a look at the fight scene by the flying wing. The Nazi is the one who's actually fighting fairly. Granted, he is twice a big as Indy.
3. And our hero spend the climax of the adventure tied to a post, squeezing his eyes shut. Our hero spends the big climax not actually doing anything.
So, based on this, we have a lazy, cheating, passive hero who makes a living robbing the artifacts of other cultures. Don't forget, Indiana Jones actually is one of the titular Raiders of the Lost Ark (which makes the DVD cover title make no sense), and at the beginning Brody does mention that the museum will buy whatever he found, as usual, with no questions asked.
And yes, I am conveniently forgetting the truck chase and the bar fight and all of the other cool action-hero stuff that he does.
But none of this really matters, because thanks to this movie, and twenty-five years of nostalgia, we now have Lego Nazis:
Raiders of the Lost Ark with Rifftrax Commentary
M'House
DVD
12/31/07
It's been a while since I last saw Raiders. I think the last time was when we showed it as a midnight movie back when I worked at AMC. The print looked like shit. That's all I remember. What I do remember is the first time I saw it. My dad took me to see it at AMC Colisuem 4, where I later worked, back in 1982 when it first came out. The theater now stands vacant. I remember being scared by all the skeletons. Maddy didn't seem to have the same reaction, though she did seemed concerned about "BIG BALL!"
The Rifftrax commentary was a bit underwhelming, though the Shane MacGowan joke was pretty good. So I won't even mention it again. What I noticed this time were three fairly big holes in the story that I didn't really pick up on before.
1. If Indy is leading an expedition through Peru, complete with pack mules and two other guys, exactly what is Jock supposed to be flying out in his two-person biplane?
2. How does Indy ride the U-Boat all the way to secret Nazi island? This one's actually explained by history and a deleted scenes. World War II submarines were primarily designed as surface vessels and only submerged for attack and defense purposes. There's a deleted scene showing Indy clinging to the periscope for the trip and presumably the boat never submerges.
3. How does Indy know not to look at the Ark? Again, deleted scenes to the rescue. There's a bit cut out of the scene where Indy and Sallah visit the old man who tells them about the staff of Ra where the old man tells them not to look at or touch anything in the Ark. Which seems kind of important.
So two of these things are explained through deletions, but that doesn't really explain the first bit, unless Indy's plan was to leave Doc Ock and the other guy stranded in the jungle. Which really kind of fits with his character throughout the rest of the movie. Let's take a look at our hero:
1. This is a guy who when everyone is digging out the Well of Souls just kind of walks around not doing anything other than wearing a hat.
2. Goes into a fistfight with a kick to the groin (Hey, it worked for Butch Cassidy) and then throws sand in the guy's face. Take a look at the fight scene by the flying wing. The Nazi is the one who's actually fighting fairly. Granted, he is twice a big as Indy.
3. And our hero spend the climax of the adventure tied to a post, squeezing his eyes shut. Our hero spends the big climax not actually doing anything.
So, based on this, we have a lazy, cheating, passive hero who makes a living robbing the artifacts of other cultures. Don't forget, Indiana Jones actually is one of the titular Raiders of the Lost Ark (which makes the DVD cover title make no sense), and at the beginning Brody does mention that the museum will buy whatever he found, as usual, with no questions asked.
And yes, I am conveniently forgetting the truck chase and the bar fight and all of the other cool action-hero stuff that he does.
But none of this really matters, because thanks to this movie, and twenty-five years of nostalgia, we now have Lego Nazis:
posted by PunchBuggyBlues at 3:31 PM
3 Comments:
"...at the beginning Brody does mention that the museum will buy whatever he found, as usual, with no questions asked."
Would it be nerdy if I wrote an essay outlining the legal issues any museum acquiring the Ark would run into?
No. Not at all.
Yes. And our kid is now playing with said Lego Nazis. Great.
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